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Letter From Father To SonDerrick Scott Davis to Derrick Davis II.
Son, you’ve made it to eighteen. Now, society calls you a man. Do you consider yourself a man?
Some groups consider you a man when you turn 12. That’s awfully early to be “A Man” but truth is, you’ve been working on this since day one. Being a man actually has little to do with age. Some old men have never really achieved authentic manhood. It’s not the size of your feet, the foods you eat, the number of friends you make. This thing, manhood, and I mean real manhood is a daily expansion, little by little taking you to a betterment for yourself than no one can earn for you.
I will forever remember the day you entered this world. My world has never been the same since the moment of your arrival. Really even before as we prepared to share a life with you. Schedules and responsibilities have never been the same. But I wouldn’t change one thing in regards to you. From this tiny little baby that was rushed to the neonatal ICU, fragile and fresh, fighting and scratching to the man you have since become, I am proud of you!
Like I said, you have been becoming a man since day one, and I am proud of you. Here are a few thoughts that I as your father, hope that you not only remember, but practice, AND pass along.
Promises are important. Your word is like the frame of your tent. If it’s not all there or not strong, your structure just won’t stand. Your integrity is one of the chief signs of the type of man that you are. Keep your promises, it really does matter.
Take care of your appearance. You better have more substance than just a first glance, but it does matter. Personal hygiene was an early lesson in your development, and no less important as a man. Some say the clothes make the man. I don’t necessarily adhere to that thought, but I do know if you prepare yourself fully, I side and out, you are truly prepared. Put your best foot forward.
Make your own fortune. Make your own way. There is not one thing wrong with receiving help when needed, but a real man is never an undue drain on those around him. Make your own way, without a handout and you never have a debt to repay.
Be a man of stand up character. Be a role model. The world that we live in is inundated with examples of all types of people. Most never live up to their potential. Be sure to take opportunities without hurting others and encourage those around you to step up their game.
It’s not honestly that difficult to keep your lips sealed so keep it straight, no gossiping. This world is full of story lines and those trying to create and destroy. Stick to taking care of your own business and you will be too busy to mind others.
A man commits to following a greater authority. You accepted Christ into your heart as Lord and Savior many years ago. You are a marked man. You have purpose and your purpose is a mirror of His Greater purpose to this dying world. Always show His love in everything that you do.
Commit to love others faithfully. Love is not a game, it is an honor and a responsibility. In all forms of love, brotherly, intimate love, and general selfless love to mankind give love it due. Regardless of the pains that may arise, love is worth it. Remember, Christ loves you and his love lives in you.
Keep your joy. No matter what trials and strife comes your way, live in a joyous manner. Joy comes from inside, that can never be taken, only given up. Happiness is the result of an outside stimulus. Your hungry, you eat, your happy. Take away what makes you happy and what’s left? Joy if you choose to live that way, and it is a choice.
Real men don’t leave wives and they honor their wives as co-heirs in Christ. ALWAYS keep the proper perspective in relationships you have. One day, you will likely find that one person you want to spend your forever with. Treat her right! And everyone along the way as well.
Never let love get in the way. At the end of the day, emotions will fail you. Keep you head on straight, your eyes wide open, and your heart ready for what comes your way. You matter too. And you need to be at your best, loved the best way possible for you to fully give your best. Yes, there are a lot of intersecting roads in those traffic directions. Do your best, that’s all anyone can ever do. Trust yourself.
Real men teach their children God’s ways (both in word and in action). A relationship with God is more than words. It is a way of life . When you have children, share the best with them. More than money or processions, share your relationship with them.
Keep your head in check! Don’t let your anger get away from you. Remember, anger in and of itself is not a bad thing, its losing your temper that gets you in trouble. Stay stable!
Their will be all manners of experience es and situations for your lifetime. Real men can show their emotions. Show your Love and do it unconditionally, and show your other emotions too. Our emotions are a gift from God. Accept them, use them, but dont a use them.
Real men take responsibility. Today people would rather talk about their “rights” than their obligations and duties, but there has never been a greater need for men who are willing to take responsibility for their actions.
Grow up but not old. Don’t let the length of day out measure your love for life and those you surround yourself with.
No, your are not a man because you are now 18. You are a man, because you are. You make great choices, you work hard, you have focus, and you love God, your family, and your neighbor.
Learn from my mistakes. I’ve made a book full, and I share them with you so that you can live better than I have. Likewise, always learn from your mistakes so that you can live a better life yourself. Remember, it’s all about choices
You are not without a support system because you are now a man. I will always be here.
I thank God every day, that he allowed me to be your father. I love you Son. Welcome to the brotherhood of manhood. Happy Birthday!!!
And what are you going to do with that 17?
Derrick Scott Davis is a single dad of two amazing sons.